WTF is He Talking About? 5 Bewildering Excerpts from Donald Trump's Disastrous WSJ Interview

WTF is He Talking About? 5 Bewildering Excerpts from Donald Trump’s Disastrous WSJ Interview

Trump Says Kushner is a ‘Good Boy’ and that’s Not Even the Strangest Excerpt from the Interview

President Trump sat down with Wall Street Journal editor-in-chief  Gerard Baker for a White House interview last week — the transcripts of which have not been published by the Journal itself. But if you’re an aficionado of nonsensical tirades, incoherent streams of consciousness or simply the collapse of the American presidency you’re in luck. Politico has obtained the full transcript.

The President thanked Baker for a positive profile the paper did on his son-in-law/adviser/czar-of-every-crisis Jared Kushner, saying that Kushner is a “good boy“. In a normal administration, that might be the lead attention grabber.

Alas, if you haven’t figured out by now, this is not a normal administration. So describing the 36-year-old father of your grandchildren in the same fashion as you would the family Golden Retriever barely registers. The full transcript itself is definitely well worth the read, assuming you have hours, a clean pair of reading glasses and a healthy dose of Xanax, whiskey or whatever you’ve been using to cope for the last nine months. But if you don’t have the time, energy, patience or constitution to see the President of the United States pull off the nearly-impossible feat of rambling on for what seems like an eternity, all the while using a severely minimalist vocabulary then you’re in luck. Here are five takeaways that will capture the true spirit and essence of the 45th President of the United States.

Scout’s Dishonor

The president took umbrage with the Wall Street Journal’s classification that reaction to his Boy Scouts Jamboree speech was “mixed”. Surprising no one, he accused the journalist of being “negative” and then presented his alternate reality.

I mean, you know, he writes mostly negative stuff. But that was a standing ovation from the time I walked out on the stage — because I know. And by the way, I’d be the first to admit mixed. I’m a guy that will tell you mixed. There was no mix there. That was a standing ovation from the time I walked out to the time I left, and for five minutes after I had already gone. There was no mix.

And I got a call from the head of the Boy Scouts saying it was the greatest speech that was ever made to them, and they were very thankful. So there was — there was no mix.

There’s only two minor, yet well-reported facts that contradict Trump’s assertions.

  1. The Boy Scouts of America formally apologized for the tone of the President’s speech.
  2. They dispute that any call was made to the White House following the address.

Interesting? Like, Nope.

The Journal asked Trump if he could provide any details about his tweet earlier that day about trade with the United Kingdom. His reply was, well, this…

No, but I can say that we’re going to be very involved with the U.K. I mean, you don’t hear the word Britain anymore. It’s very interesting. It’s like, nope.

You don’t hear the word “Britain” anymore. One can only imagine the hand signals Trump was gesturing with as he said “Nope”.

Speaking of England, etc, etc, etc…

Trump touched on the delayed confirmation of some of his ambassador picks. For a president that’s had an unusually large number of resignations and firings in a shockingly short period of time, you’d think he’d understand better than most the need for a quality vetting process. To quote the man, however, “nope”.

We’re starting to get them much quicker. You know, they’ve been really holding up – I mean, nine months, they have really been – that’s all they can do well. You know how many people I have in there? I have – I have a lot of people in there, and they complain to me. Like Woody Johnson. He’s the ambassador to the Court of St. James, which is England, you know, et cetera, et cetera. And I mean, he said what they did to him was unbelievable. The process was so ugly. I’ve had three or four people to be ambassadors, tremendous people, very successful people. They called me and they – their whole life they wanted to do this, and they gave up.

Tremendously Elegant

Then there’s this…

I want to achieve growth. We’re the highest-taxed nation in the world, essentially, you know, of the size. But we’re the highest-taxed nation in the world. We have — nobody knows what the number is. I mean, it used to be, when we talked during the debate, $2.5 trillion, right, when the most elegant person — right? I call him Mr. Elegant. I mean, that was a great debate. We did such a great job. But at that time I was talking $2.5 trillion. I guess it’s $5 trillion now. Whatever it is, it’s a lot more. So we have anywhere from 4 [trillion] to 5 or even more trillions of dollars sitting offshore.

 

Trump is most likely referring to Lester Holt — who may or may not know that the President of the United States considers him “the most elegant person”. Holt moderated the first presidential debate in 2016, where Trump mentioned that companies “are going to bring $2.5 trillion back from overseas.”  

Trump considers Holt to be so “elegant” that he’s even comfortable admitting obstruction of justice to him.

People Get Together

Finally, there’s Donald Trump’s sheer amazement at the fact that the world is full of — get this — PEOPLE…

So, you know, and these are like countries, you know, fairly large, like 300 million people. You know, a lot of people say — they say, well, but the United States is large. And then you call places like Malaysia, Indonesia, and you say, you know, how many people do you have? And it’s pretty amazing how many people they have.

Some how, some way, under some circumstances we may never truly comprehend, these are the words of the President of the United States. Where have you gone, “Fourscore and Seven Years Ago?” Whatever became of “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself”? Will we ever see an “Ask not what your country can do for you” again? Heck, is it even too much to hope for “is our children learning?” at this point?

As noted earlier, you can read the entire transcript of the interview on Politico — if you dare.

RELATED: Trump Launches Alternative Facts Show

Photo Credit: Michael Vadon on Flickr; Ben Grey on FlickrAttribution-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic (CC BY-SA 2.0

Ed Hanratty is a Reverb Press contributor and freelance political journalist. A lifelong New Jerseyan, he prides himself on having just enough Garden State sarcasm and skepticism to keep his bleeding heart in check. Keep up with Ed’s work and random ramblings on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram using the links below…but not Snapchat — that’s where he’s decided to draw the social media line. (For Now)

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Ed Hanratty is a Reverb Press contributor and freelance political journalist. A lifelong New Jerseyan, he prides himself on having just enough Garden State sarcasm and skepticism to keep his bleeding heart in check. Keep up with Ed’s work and random ramblings on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram using the links below…but not Snapchat — that’s where he’s decided to draw the social media line. (For Now)

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